Kana: (squeals and shakes her head) Kanaaa!

Darkling (coaxingly): Aww, come on, imouto-chan, it'd make all your fans happy.

*Kana pouts and crosses her arms, looking determined*

Darkling (slyly): You do realise that you're only wearing a towel, right?

Kana: (looks down and turns bright red) Kana!?!

Darkling (airily): I'm having your costume redesigned. It's too restrictive. We need less fabric for greater freedom of movement.

Kana: (looks at Darkling dubiously) Kana...

*Darkling pats Kana's damp hair reassuringly*

Darkling: It'll be tastefully done, imouto-chan, don't worry.

*Kana smiles and rubs her cheek against Darkling's arm affectionately*

Kana: (purring happily) Kana.

Darkling (aside): Phew, she actually bought it...

*Wolfson returns to room carrying a couple strips of yellow and brown material*

Wolfson (quizzically): Uh... Darkling, properties just delivered this string bikini and thong with a long tail attached to it. Do you know anything about it? Er... Kana, did you know you're only wearing a towel?

*A large sweatdrop forms on the back of Darkling's head as he stares at Wolfson, thinking furiously*

*Kana looks at the tiny bundle of cloth in Wolfson's hands, puzzled*

Kana: Kana?

Darkling (too loudly): Oh, good, you brought Kana's new hair tie! Thank you, Okami-san! Ha ha ha!

Wolfson (puzzled): Hair tie? Then why does this bit have cups--?

Darkling: (grabbing the cloth from Wolfson and ushering him towards the door) Ha ha ha! You're such a kidder, Okami-san! Cups! Those are... they're... um, they're... hairstyle facilitators!

Wolfson: Hairstyle what?

*Darkling darts over to Kana, somewhat manically, and hastily ties the strips of fabric into Kana's hair*

Darkling: See? So lovely! Ha ha! Thank you, Okami-san. Come back again soon.

*Darkling hastily shuts the door in Wolfson's face*

*Kana looks at Darkling, reaching up to bat happily at the g-string tied into her long hair*

Kana (brightly): Kana!

*Wolfson opens the door back up and pokes his head in*

Wolfson: By the way, Kurai-san, you really ought to get Kana out of that towel and into some... uh...

*Wolfson thinks for a moment*

Wolfson: Anyway, you really ought to get Kana out of that towel.

*Wolfson closes the door again*

Darkling (thoughtfully): Hmm, so the towel's not a good look, huh? I don't see any problem with it myself...

*Kana mimics Darkling's pose, bringing one small hand up to brace her chin seriously*

Kana: Kana...

*Darkling brightens and walks over to the big wardrobe labelled 'COSPLAY'*

*Kana watches, fascinated, as Darkling riffles through the selection of outfits inside the wardrobe*

Darkling: Hmm... nurse outfit? Nah, Miki's already done that schtick. And Maria...

*Kana comes up behind Darkling, putting one hand on his arm and peering around the side of him curiously*

Kana: Kana?

Darkling: (absent-mindedly strokes Kana's thigh) Yes, imouto-chan. What about this? A middle school uniform with that sailor riff that otaku find so mesmerising?

*Kana's eyes widen, and she reaches out for the uniform, only to have her fingers close on thin air as Darkling puts it back, muttering to himself*

Kana (disappointed): Kanaaa...

Darkling: Aha! What about this one? A catgirl outfit, complete with ears and a tail?

*Darkling looks at Kana appraisingly*

Kana (nodding): Kana!

Darkling (oblivious): Hmm, maybe not enough of a stretch from your Kana-chu outfit. What else is there?

Kana: (tugs on Darkling's sleeve, impatiently) KANA!

Darkling: Hmm? What is it, imouto-chan? Do you have something to-- Oh!

*Kana tugs at the towel, letting it fall to the floor, and starts rubbing her cheek against Darkling's shoulder, purring*

Darkling: Hell, Wolfson's right. Out of the towel is just fine!

Kana: (rubs herself against Darkling happily) Kaaana...

Damn... I can't think of one thing to add to that. Just sitting and looking is enough.

Pity this isn't an adult forum... then I could come up with all sorts of suggestions. But then I guess I'm about that point in my current writing.

Ah! The brain finally kicks in. I knew if I rambled long enough, something would come to mind...

*Wolfson enters the room once more. His eyes nearly pop out*

Wolfson: Gah! That's incredible! I mean... Holy... Darkling, this is a public forum! I wasn't really serious... I don't think you can actually leave Kana like that. As much as she seems to be... er... enjoying it. By the way, remind me to bring Anna next time we do this sort of thing...

*Darkling smiles easily*

Darkling: Well, I'd like to point out that, thanks to the magic of Japanese censorship laws, which we as bishoujo game fans are governed by, any naughty bits on Kana's body are conveniently covered by blurry mosaics. See?

*Darkling indicates Kana, who giggles and bounds over to Wolfson's side, the mosaics bouncing prettily*

Kana: Kana!

*Wolfson looks at the mosaics obscuring Kana's chest, appearing puzzled*

Wolfson: Um, but Darkling, these bits are perfectly acceptable under Japanese censorship laws.

Darkling: (blinks) They are?

*The mosaics flicker momentarily, then vanish. Kana turns bright red and wraps her arms around her breasts*

Darkling: Hmm, guess I didn't know that. Well, you live and learn.

*Kana runs and hides behind Darkling, peeking out red-faced at Wolfson*

Kana (embarrassed): Kanaaaa...

*Wolfson peers curiously at Kana*

Wolfson: I'm just wondering one thing, though...

*Darkling glances at Kana, and Kana tilts her head to one side*

Darkling (bemused): Uh... what?

Kana: Kana?

Wolfson: How long are you actually planning on keeping that bikini tied in Kana's hair... it does look rather... uh... unusual...

*Kana tilts her head to the other side, and a sweat bead appears on Darklings head*

Kana: Kana?

Darkling: Er... I told you it's "hairstyle facilitators."

*Wolfson raises an eyebrow*

Wolfson: Right. Should I be taking the thing back to properties then, and telling them that you'll settle for mosaics as Kana's new outfit? Not that I'm complaining, mind you, but I think her attacks will be a little ineffecient while she's covering her breasts like that...

*Darkling looks over his shoulder at Kana, who is now a nice shade of crimson*

Darkling: Er...

Kana: Kanaaa...

You know... you guys scare me sometimes. I am not sure if i should worry for you guys or just slowly back away and then make a mad dash.

*Darkling resignedly walks over to the cosplay closet and pulls out the middle school uniform that Kana was so interested in*

Darkling: (sighs) Here, Kana.

*Kana takes it gleefully and rubs up against Darkling's back momentarily, before starting to get dressed*

*Darkling looks at Wolfson sourly*

Darkling: You know, this whole 'common sense' thing of yours is really starting to bug me a little.

Wolfson: (shrugs) Hey, what you choose not to dress your imouto-chan in is no concern of mine. Go right ahead. Use bikinis as hair ties. Lead your poor innocent Kana down a path of unwitting debauchery. See if it matters to me.

Darkling: (sighs) You've tried to pull this 'pure and noble Okami-san' thing before, you know. It never does get any more convincing... Um, Wolfson?

*Wolfson blinks, having been distracted by the sight of Kana struggling into her pink panties behind Darkling's back*

*Darkling looks back over his shoulder, and sighs profoundly as Kana slips her slender arms into the straps of the matching bra, covering her pale white breasts*

Darkling and Wolfson (in unison): Bummer...

Darkling: Hah! You should know by now that there's no escape from the fearsome spectacle of utter kawaii-ness that is my Kana imouto-chan!

*Hearing her cue, Kana finishes struggling into her school uniform and raises her head eagerly*

Kana (somewhat breathlessly): Kana!

Darkling: (points at Kamajii dramatically) Let's show him, Kana! Imouto-chan attack, NOW!

Kana (fiercely): Kanaaaaa!

*Kana leaps forward to engage Kamajii, but trips over her untied shoelaces and goes crashing to the floor, her skirt flying up over the back of her sailor outfit*

Wolfson: (edges closer to stand next to Darkling) That's the dreaded imouto-chan attack?

Darkling: (laughs nervously) Well, no... but it was cute, wasn't it?

Wolfson (distractedly): 'Cute' is hardly the word...

*Wolfson and Darkling just stand there as Kana lies sprawled on the floor, awkwardly trying to pick herself up*

Wolfson: (shifting slightly sideways for a better angle on Kana's pretty posterior) So, um... are you going to help her up?

Darkling: (craning his neck sideways for similar reasons) Sure. In a minute.

Kamajii dusts off his right arm, re-adjusts his glasses, and gives Darkling a glare

Kamajii: Please don't be in a hurry. Atleast at this angle we can all enjoy the.... Scenery

*Wolfson gets a distracted look on his face as his mind suddenly wanders into strange territory*

You know, I suddenly had this vision, as I recalled an earlier discussion about Quest for Kanalot, where we all go off to where the Kana-chus roam, each capture one, dress them up in sailor suits, and pit them against each other so that we can watch them trip and fall, giving us spectacular multiple views of pretty, pantied Kana derriers...

*Wolfson shakes his head and comes back to reality as he focuses on Kana's rear end*

Wolfson: Well, I'm pretty sure that she didn't learn this bit at the Feldingford girls' school...

DarkCntry: Well then, there's nothing to add to this...so here's something completely random..

Ayu: (from Kanon) Uguu~!

DarkCntry: I now return you to your regularly scheduled ecchiness.

Speaking of which, Wolfson, when are you going to unleash your writing on the unsuspecting public? You've got enough to start with - after all, it'll be an entire series before your readers find out about the Feldingford School...

And isn't Providing Gratuitous Panty Shots 101 a compulsory course there?